Schlitzchen – Totemic Exile of Kezan

That’s a tricky name for an English reader at a first glance. Nevertheless, it’s pronounced quite easily: [‘ʃlits’hen]. It’s composed from two parts: ‘Schlitz’ (means “slot”) in German and “-chen” (as in “hen”) is the German feminine word ending (like in “Mädchen” – “girlie”). The name is an obvious hint for the most defining role which she plays among my Horde characters – wacky Goblin Engineering! Germans tend to be quite a technological nation, so I needed this name to sound something like this: German, mechanism related and tender at the same time.

As I like the race second to Gnomes (because they’re the tiny ones from the Horde), I had to find a really nice face. It’s pretty much impossible to find a good-looking face among Goblin males (and they also look the same). But girls are really classy and some are really attractive, and I guess I succeeded – this one is just a pleasure to look at (despite being the greenskin).

Despite the normal Goblin devotion to “buy cheap, sell expensive” style of life, she’s not really a gold-obsessed person and is into other things.

Schlitzchen – Keep Calm and Tinker Gadgets

Are all Goblins really so gold-obsessed?

No, not everyone. But it is essential to bargain effectively when you grow up in Goblin society. Otherwise you can easily spend your monthly income for some bread crumbs and a glass of water *laughs* it really is an option! Keep that in mind: a true Goblin thinks that the thing he sells costs exactly as much as you are eager to spend on it. So when trading with Goblins, think only of your own interests, study the market to know the real cost of things and don’t hesitate to walk away if it’s still expensive. Most likely you’ll get a few hundred percent discount.

Why Enhancement Shaman?

I actually was running a successful party business until Deathwing came and burned our home island to ashes. Then we met and saved Thrall from Alliance troops. Oh boy, he really impressed me. While I fought and learned by his side, he noticed something in me and educated me in the basics of shamanism.

Thrall in Kezan
He comes and makes everything alright. The one and only true warchief.

Unluckily it was a short acquaintance, too short for proper learning, but when we got to Kalimdor I found greatest shamanic tutors both in Orgrimmar and Thunder Bluff. Lightnings and water are not really my elements, they make my hands itchy. So I mastered melee fighting with weapons enhanced by elements of Earth and Fire. They eagerly respond my call.

How do you earn your piece of bread?

Engineering! Crafting gadgets is what every Goblin will try in his life, but it is really a passion for me. I don’t hesitate to seek the rarest items in the whole round world and beyond to make something work. I’m quite proud with my newly crafted Sky Golem Vehicle. It tends to bend right while moving, but it’s a purpose of experience. But what I really like most is tinkering unpredictable holes in space and some gadgets that help you to find ores and herbs. Each of my friends from the Horde has one.

After you retire, what’s gonna be your home? Please name your favourite places in Azeroth.

They built a nice Goblin place in Azshara. The only problem is Naga problem there (until a good Anti-Snake Cannon is invented). But all in all it’s a cool seaside resort within capital reach. And when in Feralas, please fly over the mountains that separate the zone from Silitus. Have you known we have a prosperous spa there? Take a visit! Too hot in my mind, but it’s the most luxurious place in South Kalimdor.

Spa in Feralas
Steam Pools – We Built a Spa!

Tell us about your biggest challenge

When I got blueprints for a choppa, I literally was shocked about how many resources are needed! Though Ilmari is a skilled blacksmith and Salash helped with furs and leathers, it still took loads of gold to build it. Even with my skills of barganing… Our merry company emptied our bank accounts to almost zero, leaving just enough gold to buy some food at Halfhill market. Yes, and me too! *sighs* But the bike was worth it!

What’s your agenda?

I’m glad I helped to disarm the dangerous pandarian trophy room in Garrosh’s stronghold. With his regime down, I’m tinkering some mechanical pets. It’s fun!




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